Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
