This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Randomize
