I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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