I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize