It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
He did a backflip because drugs
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