I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
