I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
