my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Randomize