I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
nutella sex= disaster
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
