my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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