how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
