$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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