Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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