You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Randomize
