I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
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