I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Randomize
