how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
