I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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