He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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