It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
