But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Randomize
