Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
