it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
