Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
