"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I need water and some morals
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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