Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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