remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
