This dress was meant to end up on your floor
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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