well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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