Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
