Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
