good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
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