No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
