Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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