i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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