do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
