She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
She even gives head with a lisp.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
A bitchslap is in order.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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