Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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