Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
