If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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