the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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