Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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