just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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