That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
