Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
