wanna go halves on a baby?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
