it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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