are you still at the devil's house?
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
