If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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