i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
